It's been really long since the last time i thought about myself, a self instated exile has finally vanished, preferred in search of true values of life, eternal peace and serenity, with nothing turning out to be optimistic the last nail drilled on the empty coffin of hopes aspirations and admiration's.
.. n thus, I'm back !!
The air outside seem to have new vibes (i thought..) but my sixth sense quickly knocked me off the sleep over into the reality of this world. I thought that there would have been major changes since the experiment being conducted in the large hadron collider, the local newspaper almost predicted the end of the universe(i wished so..) but the life of my little spidey seems to be the same. Weeks after weeks he spins around a new web on the lower end of drawer ( cum ash-tray), he did seem to be disturbed during the period of the experiment, wonder if these creatures are angels in disguise..
Wondering at the changes around, the Americans celebrating the historic win on Barack Hussein Obama in the recent concluded presidential elections (i followed it quiet closely), the fall of major banking firms, the dripping economy, falling fuel prices, major bail outs, job cuts etc etc..
it's been quiet a happening for the media community, fuelling in a new life thereby retiring the news channels of the pesky cat fights of the film industry, routine fire crackers ( RDX, Ammonia, Nitrates, contained) etc..
.. looking further there's been quiet a change in the little world around me as well..
some are on the verge of looking into the new era of life (marriage), some trying to negotiate their dreams into realities (migrating to US for higher studies).. and many more, considering some of them that remain un informed.. hmph..
.. but some things in this are devoid of the sunshine, the new morning, the new beginning, the urge to evolve from the grave and transcend to the cradle..
I cried my heart out on the lanes running beside the Food point of my institution, as i was denied the least of the favours asked, a few minutes, a very little effort that would have least of all made me gay for the very next moment. I thought changes are in live are meant for both evil and good (everyone falls in either of the two categories.. but.. where am I ??).
aha.. suddenly the bronchitis seem to feel a different pressure inside me.. i sense an expiration (in terms of breathing)..
I saw off my little joy the other day on the airport terminal, the little excitement, support that kindled inside the lonely heart flew off the IC 883 sharjah bound flight, another promising soul ended the eight month long commitment, settling into it's own world of fantasies, a close family unit departed back to the home land (DXB).
The life long pals, no more seem to be interested in the fairy tales of friendship, the long linking thread has lost it's glitter. The prospects of better future, new pathways, better partners seem to justify the ageing of the previous bonds.
(Q: "Old is Gold" [still ??] ).. hmph..
Unfortunately (again), the new peers around me seem to be no delight, even after being the rightest of angels in all the deeds and works the hostile attitude has no signs of alteration. I wonder if I really deserve the punishment's ?? It's really odd when I'm forced to think about these age old, historic issues of my life in this rapidly developing era, but the more odd it seems ... more real it gets into my life..
However, the word count seems to be indicating a thousand which according to general pshycosis might eat up a few hundred thousand seconds to read and understand (the crap)..
.. seems quite a lot considering the busy schedules of the people..
Leaving this portal seems to be quiet heavy, after just a short stint, but its bound to happen. I hope to come back to you people soon.
Note: The views on this blog are totally personal. Anything objectionable is deeply regretted.
However, the fact remains that Truth always stands it's position..
Hope to reunite again.. for the dedication of "Smoked Souls"
Logging off..
mE 'n mA lonE SouL
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Dubai...
Dubai… I used to be there a few days back.
Dubai… I had fun there.
Dubai… where I grew up.
Dubai… where my parents stay.
Dubai… hot as ever.
Dubai… pretty.
Dubai… the place where the 9/11 terrorists came from.
Dubai… expensive.
Dubai… beautiful.
Dubai… non democratic.
Dubai… rich boy’s playground.
Dubai… tallest building in the world.
But for me…Dubai… HOME.
MeE
JB signin off...
Dubai… I had fun there.
Dubai… where I grew up.
Dubai… where my parents stay.
Dubai… hot as ever.
Dubai… pretty.
Dubai… the place where the 9/11 terrorists came from.
Dubai… expensive.
Dubai… beautiful.
Dubai… non democratic.
Dubai… rich boy’s playground.
Dubai… tallest building in the world.
But for me…Dubai… HOME.
MeE
JB signin off...
Sunday, April 13, 2008
‡..From the Cradle to the †Grave†..
The awful chassis of the Bajaj Pulsar, Model: 2000 broke down on the national highway, as I flew through the thin air due to Inertia at motion, falling right on the ramous mandible. The fellow on the driving seat had his heart out as he watched me puking a thousand ounces of pure human blood.
I remember being bandaged on the bed of the nearby primary health centre, it wasn’t all that new until a moment when the angels of death passed across my sight, the soul began to shiver as if asked to be nude on the Arctic’s. My little thinking factory scrolled through my entire life searching for good deeds, looking for praises, hoping or well- wishers. I thought of many instances but all ended up as a mirage in great sands of Arabia.
Every bright beginning had a sour ending. Every favor done had a series of misleading acts to reach its actual destination. I quickly apologized to all of who I could remember.
In the midst of this chaos and agony there came a little fairy, whispered some un understandable chants and went away. I flashed opened my eyes, my luck had favored me for the first time, I looked upon my complete peer group, relatives..
..unfortunately I could afford only a battered smile..
It wasn’t long enough as I reached my mansion with my chin bandaged after being stitched, and the burns being attended upon, some mere ordinary ointment.
I was hurt, damaged, injured, horrified, helpless as I lie down on my resting square trying to resist the pain due to the impact of the fall.
A week had gone by destiny struck again, the lord of the dungeons came upon the earth my jaws were tied down with heavy metal bars and jammed together with ultra synthetic rubber bands, to await the healing of the broken condoyle, awfully discovered only after 168 hours of the incident. Thereafter I forced on a fluid diet for another 41 days 14 hours and 47 seconds.
..I wondered will I recover of the first accident or probably the last accident of my unforgiving life..
That’s quiet a history know…
Life has taken it’s own way, with more joyful surprises and unthinkable obstacles to be faced. Just a s I came back what could be the most enterprising, enduring, enthralling, stupendous vacation back in Dubai, a new whiz awaited my arrival.
I learnt that I had to stay all alone in the 2700sq.ft mansion, a friend pledged to have live together mocked away.
I wondered what had gone wrong between us? Did I deserve this? Or was it that I just discovered “Mr. Hyde” . I could not recall an instance that could have been the reason of this agony. I wish one would tell me where was I wrong?
Wonder why life has no mercy on me?
Am I the worst ever person existing in this world?
It wasn’t longer that I picked up a routine, the part of my life that even Columbus would never have wished to discover.
I cried the nights and cursed the days as each passing hour would mimic the plight of my soul. I lived with people back biting about my condition, as if I was the only sinner in this world.
Wonder how quickly the days change…
..An year ago..
I was in the hostel with the much awaited 5-storey birthday cake and the Campus Fiesta - 07 event to follow. The heart would dance on the ribs as the count down began. For once I rejoiced from the depth of my heart in spite of being away from my home land.
18th February 2008
00:00 am
I lied back at my resting square staring at the long night, with the eyes flooded of memories and happenings. I wondered if this was the only thing that was left to happen with this soul.
I remember attending a few calls of well wishers but even today I was left to gasp around when “some” didn’t even bother to leave a blank call.
..I hope it’s not a sin to expect things from people you call “friends”..
..Is man a born sinner?
As if this wasn’t enough, I sat back all alone in the penultimate row of the Fiesta - 08 fanfare amidst the chaos of “Dard - e- Disco” by Kultar Singh, while the entire college flocked together dancing the night as if the blossoms of English summer.
Wonder will I succeed any day in my life in evolving out of this miraculous web wound around me?
I wish I at least succeed academically, and leave the rest on my hard luck, fate, destiny..
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.
- denis waitley
..Aha....Let’s hope that I start loving the misfortunes and be grateful to the routine tortures and constant rejection of my favors done..
…..
…….
Shucks !
Even the newspapers do not avoid mocking the condition of this soul..
† ..O Lord! Relieve me of my pain, agony, despair, grieve and give a chance to the soul to live through the fanatics of this world like all others…
.. I beg you.. ma lord.. †
..
Signing off..
mE ‘n mA LonE souL
Vote for me now! Blogomania 2010 sponsored by Odyssey360 The 24 hour online book store with 5 milion books to choose from.
I remember being bandaged on the bed of the nearby primary health centre, it wasn’t all that new until a moment when the angels of death passed across my sight, the soul began to shiver as if asked to be nude on the Arctic’s. My little thinking factory scrolled through my entire life searching for good deeds, looking for praises, hoping or well- wishers. I thought of many instances but all ended up as a mirage in great sands of Arabia.
Every bright beginning had a sour ending. Every favor done had a series of misleading acts to reach its actual destination. I quickly apologized to all of who I could remember.
In the midst of this chaos and agony there came a little fairy, whispered some un understandable chants and went away. I flashed opened my eyes, my luck had favored me for the first time, I looked upon my complete peer group, relatives..
..unfortunately I could afford only a battered smile..
It wasn’t long enough as I reached my mansion with my chin bandaged after being stitched, and the burns being attended upon, some mere ordinary ointment.
I was hurt, damaged, injured, horrified, helpless as I lie down on my resting square trying to resist the pain due to the impact of the fall.
A week had gone by destiny struck again, the lord of the dungeons came upon the earth my jaws were tied down with heavy metal bars and jammed together with ultra synthetic rubber bands, to await the healing of the broken condoyle, awfully discovered only after 168 hours of the incident. Thereafter I forced on a fluid diet for another 41 days 14 hours and 47 seconds.
..I wondered will I recover of the first accident or probably the last accident of my unforgiving life..
That’s quiet a history know…
Life has taken it’s own way, with more joyful surprises and unthinkable obstacles to be faced. Just a s I came back what could be the most enterprising, enduring, enthralling, stupendous vacation back in Dubai, a new whiz awaited my arrival.
I learnt that I had to stay all alone in the 2700sq.ft mansion, a friend pledged to have live together mocked away.
I wondered what had gone wrong between us? Did I deserve this? Or was it that I just discovered “Mr. Hyde” . I could not recall an instance that could have been the reason of this agony. I wish one would tell me where was I wrong?
Wonder why life has no mercy on me?
Am I the worst ever person existing in this world?
It wasn’t longer that I picked up a routine, the part of my life that even Columbus would never have wished to discover.
I cried the nights and cursed the days as each passing hour would mimic the plight of my soul. I lived with people back biting about my condition, as if I was the only sinner in this world.
Wonder how quickly the days change…
..An year ago..
I was in the hostel with the much awaited 5-storey birthday cake and the Campus Fiesta - 07 event to follow. The heart would dance on the ribs as the count down began. For once I rejoiced from the depth of my heart in spite of being away from my home land.
18th February 2008
00:00 am
I lied back at my resting square staring at the long night, with the eyes flooded of memories and happenings. I wondered if this was the only thing that was left to happen with this soul.
I remember attending a few calls of well wishers but even today I was left to gasp around when “some” didn’t even bother to leave a blank call.
..I hope it’s not a sin to expect things from people you call “friends”..
..Is man a born sinner?
As if this wasn’t enough, I sat back all alone in the penultimate row of the Fiesta - 08 fanfare amidst the chaos of “Dard - e- Disco” by Kultar Singh, while the entire college flocked together dancing the night as if the blossoms of English summer.
Wonder will I succeed any day in my life in evolving out of this miraculous web wound around me?
I wish I at least succeed academically, and leave the rest on my hard luck, fate, destiny..
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude.
- denis waitley
..Aha....Let’s hope that I start loving the misfortunes and be grateful to the routine tortures and constant rejection of my favors done..
…..
…….
Shucks !
Even the newspapers do not avoid mocking the condition of this soul..
† ..O Lord! Relieve me of my pain, agony, despair, grieve and give a chance to the soul to live through the fanatics of this world like all others…
.. I beg you.. ma lord.. †
..
Signing off..
mE ‘n mA LonE souL
Vote for me now! Blogomania 2010 sponsored by Odyssey360 The 24 hour online book store with 5 milion books to choose from.
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